Thursday, October 28, 2010
Food today got a little on the high side, carb-wise, but still came in okay for calories. Inquiring minds want to know what I'm eating, so Tamzin, here's what I had today:
Coffee with creamer - 35 cals
Raisin Bran cereal - 110 cals
2% milk, half cup - 60 cals
peanuts - 105 cals
Turkey/provolone sandwich on wheat/rye
with mayo, lettuce, tomatoes 400 cals
bag of chips (I know) - 200
grapes - 60 cals
3 York patties - 150 cals
popcorn @ Honda - 55 cals
Tyson Brisket - 140 cals
carrots - 30 cals
Steamfresh roasted potatoes - 140 cals
slice of sour dough bread - 110
ginger snaps - 140 cals
Todays grand total: 1735
Something I'm noticing about not restricting certain foods is...I feel in control. I am striving to make healthier choices, but just knowing that as long as what I eat fits into my daily total, I don't get all down on myself. Usually, I'm so busy thinking about what I can't have that I don't think about what I can have. Cool.
Hope you have an awesome day. Drink your water!!
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
I felt a bit tempted today to cheat and ate 3 York Peppermint Patties (for 150 cals-they were the little ones). I added those calories in to my total so I wouldn't go over. I'm not even hungry for dinner (I think it's still the anger issue) so I'm going to focus on drinking my water and getting to bed at a decent hour. I don't ever - and I mean ever - willingly go to bed. It's a real habit of mine - avoiding sleep. Then once I'm finally in bed and it's dark and cool and relaxing, I'm glad to be there. Weird, I know.
I'm taking my car in to the dealership tomorrow. I don't have keyless entry and for the last month my key won't open the driver side door. I've been opening the passenger side and using a cane (my late uncle's old cane), I reach over and flip the lock up so the doors will unlock. I'm sure it's hilarious to watch ;) Anyhoo, now the passenger side door is acting up and I refuse to crawl in through the back (it's a CR-V). So, bright and early I'll be there to see what this little item is gonna cost. I wish I'd gotten keyless entry, but 7 years ago when I bought my little cutie, I was so excited to get a new car that I didn't even think about it.
Hope you are drinking your water and tallying those calories!
Monday, October 25, 2010
Allen's Double Dog Dare You Challenge! I'm excited about having a plan to get me started again.
Current weight: 252.8
Goal (for now): 170
My calories for the day (each and every day): 1870
Wow! That's a lot of calories! Yay! Nom.Nom.
Thanks, Allan, for the motivation to get back at it. So far today, I've done great with my food and water. And, I found a cool App for my iPhone called DailyBurn. I love me some healthy apps. I have the free version right now. I may be interested in the paid version if I need more help with workouts.
If you want to check out Allan's challenge you can find it here.
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Thanks to Tamzin, I found Allen's challenge! It's just what I need to get me back on track. Surely, I can commit to two weeks!
It all seems totally do-able, too. Here are the rules if you want to join in:
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Some of my numbers improved, some not so much. Cholesterol was 196, HDL 39, Triglycerides 179, LDL 121, and blood sugar 97 (fasting). I don't know if the numbers improved because I was more active this year or if it's because I've been eating whatever I want. Last year I had been dieting strictly and I was 15 lbs lighter but my HDL and LDL were really bad. I'm sure it's because I've been more active. I'm just glad that my blood sugar is still in the normal range.
I think I've been a boring blog lately. I'm sorry for that. It looks like a couple of "followers" have split and that makes me a little sad. I know that shouldn't bother me, but when I blogged often, I looked forward to the comments. It's nice to have that input and I miss it. I read a lot of blogs and I don't always comment either. I will try to work that.
Janell, thanks for reminding me to not give up on healthy. That is what it's really all about, isn't it?
Saturday, October 16, 2010
This week I was going to stop blogging. I've been eating as if we were having threat of famine. Stuffing myself, actually. And I don't even know why. I wanted to eat and so I did. Now, of course, I'm wishing I hadn't stuffed myself for days. I don't want to get on the scale...don't need to...my pants feel tighter already.
I wanted to try to have a go at food like normal people. So, I tried having a sandwich with chips. Then I had to have cookie. Then I had mac and cheese (the really good, rich kind). The next day I was out of control. I thought about food all day. I stopped by the store and bought candy and stashed it so I could eat it while no one was looking. Obviously, I still can't be trusted with food.
This dieting thing just gets to me sometimes but I'm not giving up. That's my claim to fame.
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Saturday, October 2, 2010
Anyway, I've been soul searching this week. That sounds better than saying I'm having a pity party, don't ya think? I've been dieting for so long that I'm sick of it. I mean, I've literally been dieting for about 25 years now and I'm still fat. There have been days (and weeks/months) where I didn't restrict myself. But those periods only led to weight gain. Then, I shame myself back to restricting myself to lose what I gained. It's this viscous cycle of diet, lose some, stall, get depressed, eat everything, feel bad, go on yet another diet. This week I didn't feel like putting myself through the usual beating. "Eat this, don't eat that!" "Why aren't you out riding?" "Really? You think you should be eating that?" So, I ate with abandon. And now I feel like I've gained about ten pounds, Who's sorry now?
I'm not to be trusted with food. When I don't restrict myself, I eat too much. I know this. I don't have to be reminded by anyone that I can eat a lot of food when it's on my plate. And there's my mom taking inventory of how much food I have on my plate. She makes little comments about how much food some people can eat at one time. She takes four bites of something and says she's full. Of course, every time she goes to her room for something, she comes out chewing. (She has a stash of candy in there.) I sound angry, don't I? Well, I guess I am. I need to make peace with food. I just don't know what that means.
I know what to eat. I know all about exercise. I could be a nutritionist, really. All that doesn't help me to stay on the straight and narrow. For my health, I need to lose weight. For my health, I need to be active. But for my heart, I need something else. I need to find the right carrot on a stick to get me on track.
Last weekend I was in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Had a wonderful time. It's so pretty there and the weather was fantastic. I think I brought the good weather back with me, too. It's been cooler and drier here in Houston this week. The week before I left, I did the usual "starve to lose a few before a big trip" thing. I lost a pound or two. The same pound or two that I've been losing and gaining for the past few months. That's when it started, the overwhelming frustration. I'm so sick of this constant dieting. And yet I really do want to be thinner. (This sounds like a crazy woman's rant now.)
I'm not giving up. I'm just going to have to go at this a different way. I just have to figure out what that way is.