I went to a funeral today for a co-workers' mother. I didn't know her mother but I went in support of my friend. She has been through so much with her family, more than I need to go into here, but just know she's had a tough road lately.
The service was really nice and the woman was spoken of with love and fondness. They talked about how she lived her life and how they thought of her as being strong and vibrant. They had pictures of her at many different ages and she looked like she enjoyed her life.
This got me to thinking about how I hate having my picture taken now. Since I've been overweight, I don't like what I see when I do see a picture of me. So, there aren't many pictures of me from the last, oh, I'd say, 15 years. I've taken lots of pictures of places and things and family. But in most of those pictures you don't see me at all.
I got to thinking that this might not be fair to my family. They might want to see pictures of me someday. And even though I don't look the way I want to, this is how I look today. The way my family sees me everyday is who I am right now. I know they love me just the way I am so maybe I shouldn't leave myself out of pictures just because I can't bare it.
It was sad today but I got the feeling that the woman who passed away was loved despite all her warts and freckles. Something I needed to witness today so that I can realize how short life is. And how someday we will all be remembered. I don't want to be remembered for always being unhappy with myself. I want to be remembered for my adventurous spirit. I want to be seen living my life and not afraid to be in the picture.
Lets look at ourselves the way our loved ones see us and know that they are not wrong. We are worthy of their love. We need to be in the picture!
Take care. Take out some old photos and look at who your family loves. And drink your water!
Yeah. There are about four instances of pictures of my husband and I... it is kind of a sad thing because we are missing records of the first five years of our relationship. I relate to this so much.
ReplyDeleteI can relate to this post as well. I'm a photo-hound and have always been the family photographer. I'd like to be in SOME of the pictures, but not looking like this. :(
ReplyDeleteHey girl, don't you be dissin' on freckles!
ReplyDeleteI'm with you on avoiding photos. There's probably a decade or so of my life that's missing, too.
really good post. I know that I am being self centered when I will not allow my pic to be taken. I know they are just trying to make a memory. I do want to be in the memory, just not the pic. I wouldn't even get our yearly family pic taken at Christmas time. I had gained alot of weight last year. the picture will be taken this year! You made me think!
ReplyDeleteMy sister got so irritated with me at Easter over this. I thought I was being discreet moving out of the picture, but she busted me. She has so many beautiful pictures of herself and her family and she is shorter and heavier than me! But it is her attitude and love of life and happy face that shows. And I am just absent from those pictures for the most part.
ReplyDeleteFrom now on I am going to really try to smile and enjoy having my picture made. Thank you so much for this post!!
Hi
ReplyDeleteGreat post.
My boyfriend is forever shooting me, it drives me mad. He thinks I'm his personal model! That's pretty cool.
I know how your family will feel if you don't just get in those photos...My mother wouldn't get her photo taken after I was born because she was so skinny (Imagine! Where did I get my genes?). I miss those torn-up and not taken photos of my beautiful mother. :(
Tena, this is an amazing post. Thanks so much.
ReplyDeleteI really like this post. I used to be like that when I was heavy. I remember a trip to Europe where I was in pictures but hated looking at them.
ReplyDeleteMaybe some more motivation to get out on our bikes! (tomorrow will be around 80--after my first grass cutting it's a bike ride for me!)
Good point. I have whole albums of vacations I've taken with the family and I am no where to be seen. My excuse is that I'm always the one taking the pictures. But, no more, I'll be stepping in front of the camera. You are so right. Thanks for opening my eyes to this.
ReplyDeletePictures are such an important part of life. I'm so glad we have a lot of pictures of my dad, who passed away a few years ago. Even though he didn't look too good in the pictures from the later years, I still cherish them.
ReplyDeleteOur families do deserve to have pictures of us too, no matter how we think we look. The pictures are not for us, they are for them.