Thursday, December 18, 2008

Hello, My Name Is...

sugar addict. I really didn't want to post this but I'm trying to be real here, unashamed to admit my downfalls and exuberant to share my successes. This week has not been a good one for me in regards to food. After Monday, my eat-clean diet took a dumpster dive! I totally caved. Damn, I hate that I still have to fight with myself about food choices.

I was given some fudge last week and I put it in my drawer intending to take it home and give it to my family. I found it Tuesday and, well let's just say, it was good. Really frickin good. Then yesterday we had our office lunch party. It's with all of us in the business office and secretarial areas. Someone plans it each year and brings a dessert and we all do the White Elephant gift exchange game. The person that planned it this year ordered from an Italian place so we had salad, which was good, and pasta. Three different kinds of pasta. I was okay with that. I had a lot of salad and a small serving of the spinach lasagne and one piece of garlic bread. Then I had dessert. It was some kind of whipped cream pudding cookie crap and I ate it.

I have been spiraling out of control ever since. I have had cookies and candy. I feel like crap, too. I've been very sleepy today and groggy. Like in a stupor. I am disgusted with myself because I could not just walk away from the temptation. My first thought is that there is no hope for me in the future. I mean, even if I can get most of this weight off me, will I be able to look at candy and cookies and not want to consume six peoples share?!!

I am getting a grip because I don't want to undo what I have done since Dec. 1st. I am sick and tired of losing and gaining the same pounds. I read your blogs and you are all doing so well. I am proud of how so many of you are sticking to your plan. I will keep reading and working on getting the sugar out of my diet. Thanks to all of you, too, for the great support you send out everyday!

10 comments:

  1. awww, sorry sugar!(I had to!! teehee) somedays are worse then others HEY! you can do it.

    I know it.

    :)

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  2. I don't want to admit to how many sugar cookies I ate last night! Oh, it's a tough time of year!!! I'm righ there dumpster diving with you...but it's a new day. I threw out a bunch of junk and trying HARD to get back on track. Many are having the same struggles as you...it's tough! But let's get through the holidays without too much regret.

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  3. The worse thing i find about sugar is that when i have some i just can't stop!! And it is sooo hard to stop having it once you've started. I totally understand where you are coming from! And this time of year is the hardest to stay away from it. But i know you can do it!!

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  4. I'm sorry, what? I was just distracted by your motivation picture again... :) I'm right there with you on the sugar addiction. They say the chemical iteractions in your brain are very similar to those of drug addicts. I believe it!

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  5. I wish they would invent a pill that kills sugar cravings. I really do. I'm there with you. Throw it out! Today is pay day....the bad me wants to go buy something sweet...the good me (who I am praying wins) says, nope....not putting it in the cart!

    Best wishes!

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  6. I totally know how you're feeling ... both the craving of sugar (mmmm fudge!) and the sluggish feeling afterwards. Hang in there. And I'm hanging in too in trying to avoid sugar!

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  7. "...some kind of whipped cream pudding cookie crap"....sounds irresistable :) LOL!

    Tena, honey, please don't be so hard on yourself, ok? This is for keeps...you'll make it!

    It just goes to show you how totally EVIL sugar can be to some of us. If I were to start now on the sugary treats, It'd be over for me because I'm addicted to the sh*t too!

    Just because this happened doesn't mean that you'll 'never' be able to overcome this obstacle. One day at a time is all we can do.

    I have faith in you! You WILL make it in 2009!

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  8. Thank you for the well wishes, Tena!
    Are you back on track today?

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  9. Hey, seriously, don't be so hard on yourself. Sugar is a true addiction. Eating clean really can help with the cravings but it is SO easy to fall back off again. The cool thing is, you can get right back on! Holidays are so fricking rough....

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  10. Hang in there--this time of year is so tough! All the goodies added with the cold just make me want to go and hibernate.

    Soon enough we'll have all those wonderful resolutions to make ;)

    Take care of yourself and we'll get on track! Happy holidays!!!

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